I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
