Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Panties = found
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
