If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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