did you get engaged???
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
