Bisexual people are plain selfish.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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