scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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