this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
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