we're making bets on your personal life
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
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