There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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