I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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