There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
