We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
i think my cat just said my name.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
