problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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