But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
