I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
