If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
