Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
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