yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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