Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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