best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
