You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
smell my finger.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
