i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
she smelled like a LAN party
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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