Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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