i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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