She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
