My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
