There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
