did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
