at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize