I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
