Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Randomize
