So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
