He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
third nipple confirmed
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
