I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
No stitches, just platelets and will power
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Randomize
