come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
