That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
