So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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