Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
