he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
