You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
