Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
