i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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