I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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