im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
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