you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
