Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
