Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
