She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize
