What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Someone signed my nipple.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
