I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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